During particularly hasteful mornings, my daughter has taken to ask me whether I’m “Nice or Mad.” It helps her sort out whether or not to be anxious, angry, or aggressive or something else entirely. I’ve never before thought about this unique justaposition but it, in fact, jibes nicely with other psychological differentiations that I’ve been fond of in the past. These include:

• Creep or Asshole: A former professor of mine at the University at Albany remarked once that all people could be easily categorized into the former or latter. I’m the former.
• Dumb or Stupid: I recall being in high school and people called each other one or the other. I’m dumb.
• Sorry or Sordid: I made this one up. I’m sorry.